Brand and hail hail Barry O'Bama

When those glorious gazelles and fine purveyors of pop Girls Aloud confessed that they were unable to converse in French and as a consequence would let the funky music do the talking instead, it resonated at Kristalseventeen. Your humble correspondent can barely speak English and a result, has a tendency to let this blog talk on its behalf.

In another music led comparison, on the title track of their 2003 comeback album ‘Strays’, Jane’s Addiction’s Perry Farrell admitted that he gets by on his personality. Another gangly sex insect in the form of Russell Brand seems to do likewise. In the aftermath of the Andrew Sachs prank call chaos, it seems that your personality will only get you so far.

If you haven’t heard the broadcast that has caused all the fuss, the enduring conclusion you may come to is that throughout Brand just isn’t funny. Which makes you think, was he ever that amusing in the first place? The phalanx of vehicles that Channel 4 have created for him to fit his persona have never worked and the most recent effort ‘Ponderland’, a series of opinions via video clips is a format so tired that even Lenny Henry had beat him to it in the shape of the execrable ‘LennyHenry.tv’ on BBC1.

Brand is undoubtedly talented, his verbal dexterity and instantaneously sharp analysis on ‘Big Brother’s Big Mouth’, the show that brought him to the forefront of media attention admittedly was at times utterly hilarious and genuinely entertaining. So there actually is something decent going on under that bouffant hairdo. He must realise that he is at his most cutting and yes, funny, when commenting on current events. He surely is also intelligent enough appreciate the irony that he and Jonathan Ross have been involved in a furore with enough material for an entirely new stand up show and that it is most unfortunate for this truly rock ‘n’ roll comedian that he is unable to comment on it without causing more upset than he and Mr Ross have already made.


Republican Presidential candidate John McCain’s personality however, has never really been in doubt. Touting himself as a straight talking maverick underdog, it is even more dismaying to see the 72 year old add another string to his shop damaged bow by taking on the mantle of a flopsweat drenched amateur stand up comedian. His feeble gags in the direction of Barack Obama’s mid-week thirty minute campaign advertisement were neither consise, statesmanlike or more relevantly, presidential.

All that he achieved in uttering these barbs was to rubber stamp the already widely held belief that the septuagenarian Senator of Arizona is not fit to take over from the current simian in charge of the White House and is better suited to an early retirement as the man who collects and exchanges the shoes at a bowling alley, where the clientele is made up exclusively of children’s party clowns.

There is no doubt in this blog’s mind that in two days time the Leader of the Free World will be a black man and it is relishing the gradual seismic shift within the whole of the world’s political landscape that such an event will effect. These will be truly thrilling times and this writer will be partying in a manner benefiting Scotland winning the World Cup on November 4th and into the 5th should the what must surely be inevitable occur.

Begone Joe The Plumber imposters, death to moose hunting creationist pro-lifer hockey moms, go to hell so-called war hero nine house owning Grand Old Party relics and shame on the Westboro Baptist Church for good measure.

Welcome to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Mr Obama.